“No More Pull-Ups.”

“Nice.”

These are the final lines of dialogue from “2012,” the mother of all disaster movies. Something like six billion people die in the movie, but gosh darnit, those cute kids and the lovable pooch make it safely to Noah’s Ark 2: Apocalyptic Boogaloo.

Don’t get me wrong. I’d much rather watch this 150 minute pile of absurdity than any minute of “Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen.” I just think it’s hilarious that on Oscar weekend, a time to celebrate the best of what the movie industry can offer, the #1 DVD rental in all the land will be a movie about the coolness of natural disasters. Maybe let Haiti skip this one for a while.

(more…)